


The flask

by Taaya



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, Love Confessions, Love Potion/Spell, Teenagers, bit of a character study, severus is an idiot, still it could be worse, trigger warning: mentioning of suicidal thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-28
Updated: 2017-02-28
Packaged: 2018-09-27 12:28:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10020791
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Taaya/pseuds/Taaya
Summary: After having an especially bad day, Severus finds a flask of love potion in his pocket for him to 'use it well'.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Just a small one-shot that came to me at 2am when I was sleepless and there was nothing on the telly ;)

Today had been a bad day, even worse than usual. Potter and his minions had hexed him worse than ever and it had taken almost all his potion reserves to heal the cuts and bruises. And he did not have anything to cure the rash that had grown on some rather delicate parts of his body. He wanted it to end. Once and for all. Those were the days when Severus wanted nothing more than to be dead. But then again, tonight he would be meeting Lily to study together. Lily, who kept him alive. Who kept him in his right mind. 

Still he had to survive dinner which was easier said than done. As if it would not be enough that Gryffindors hated him for just being him, and Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs just didn’t give a damn about him. Slytherins hated him, too. Because of Lily. Because he spent time with a mudblood. And even though they seemed to respect him for his talents in the Dark Arts, they made no secret of how much they despised his ‘unnatural’ behaviour.

He had nobody, except for Lily, and still it was better than losing her just to be friends with his house mates, wasn’t it? And so he did everything he could to be the best friend she could think of. Everything but giving up his one true passion: Studying the Dark Arts.  
It wasn’t about being an evil or even just a powerful wizard. Severus was rather fascinated of all the possibilities that magic held. There were dark spells only created to defend oneself and all the potions. Sure, poisons were dark, but come to think of it, so were love potions as they suppressed the free will of a person, and still most of the girls looked forward to next year, when they would finally learn how to make them. So how could it be that he was called evil - by his best friend! - just because he was interested in the Dark Arts? 

With a sigh he hid his face in his palms. He was sitting at the Slytherin table, but as far away from everybody else as possible. Still he could hear them talk about him, laugh at him. And he could see their disgust when they looked at him.  
So he ate as fast as he could, sealing two cups of pumpkin juice with a spell so he could transport them in his robes. That was what they always did. Severus brought the drinks and Lily the food for if they got hungry, or the other way around. And then they would meet up in an empty classroom.

“Sev, you alright?”, Lily asked when he finally came in. “I saw you at dinner and you looked horrible”  
“Thank you, that’s just exactly what a boy wants to hear”, Severus joked, but just so she would not keep asking. She knew about some things Potter and his friends had done to him, but he did not want her to know everything. He could not take the humiliation of being the punching bag for the whole school. And whenever she stood up for him, she only made it worse - and whenever she heard of him being bullied, she DID stand up for him. He loved her for it, but feared it at the same time. 

Lily looked at him and frowned. She knew exactly when he kept secrets from her. But then again she knew him, at least better than everybody else. She knew that his life at home was a living nightmare and that Hogwarts wasn’t better. Only here there were teachers looking out for them, so that Severus did not get beaten up as often as at home where Tobias drunk himself almost to death. “Okay”, she let him off the hook. “Let’s study. Well, I … I was … D’you mind if I leave you alone for a sec? I was in such a hurry to check on you that I haven’t been to the toilet and …” 

Severus smiled at her. It was a rare occasion to see him smile at all but Lily liked it. “Girls and their symbiotic existence with bathrooms”, he mocked but nodded. Of course he didn’t mind. One could not fight nature.  
“Be right back”, Lily promised. “You could already conjure the pillows for practicing Charms, please?” With that she was gone, hurrying down the corridors towards the closest girl’s bathroom. 

The Slytherin wanted to pull his wand out of his pocket, but instead his fingers touched something cold. Frowning, he pulled out whatever he had just touched and looked down on a flask of pale pink potion with a tag on it. ‘Use it well.’ There was one poison he knew that had this colour, but a simple sniff told him all he needed to know. No poison, but a love potion. A rather weak one, not strong enough to be used to bed somebody. Only some cuddling, maybe kisses.

He pulled her pumpkin juice closer and was about to slip the potion in when he changed his mind, put the stopper back into the flask and put it away.  
“Severus Snape, what did you do?”  
Lily. Her voice was cold, hard.  
“What exactly did you slip into my cup? I … I never thought you’d be like them. Like James and all those … idiots that take advantage of everybody whenever they feel like it. I thought … we’d be friends.”  
Now her voice was softer, but she sounded hurt and even though Severus stared down at his hands he could hear the tears. 

What had he done? Well, actually he had not done anything but still he had screwed up and now there was no going back, only two paths to choose to go forward. Either he could be the sexual assaulting creep that nobody liked or the boy who was desperately in love with his best friend who had almost done something bad - but had stopped in time. Either way he would lose her. 

With a sigh he pulled the flask out of his pocket once more. “I didn’t do it. I could not”, he said and handed it over, still not looking at her.  
Lily sniffed as well and frowned. “Love potion. You … you wanted to rape me?” 

Now Severus had to look up and shake his head. “No. Never. It’s not that strong. And I didn’t make it. I found it in my pocket only minutes ago and … I’m such an idiot. I should have never even thought about it. It would have only been enough to … to spend a few hours hugging and cuddling and … it’s still wrong and that’s why I did not do it. I could not.”  
“But why did you even think about it in the first place? I mean …you’re not … are you?”  
Severus let out a bit of bitter laughter. “You really have to ask? Well, that … means, that I can put up a good mask. I guess that’s the only good thing to come out of this situation. Look, Lily, I’m sorry. I know you don’t feel this way. How could you? Nobody even likes me. I understand if you do not wish to see me ever again and …” 

He was interrupted by a stinging pain in his cheek. Lily had slapped him. He had not expected that, but it seemed appropriate.  
“That’s for thinking about drugging me.”  
Another slap.  
“That’s for even thinking about me not wanting to see you again.”  
And then there was a different sensation. Warmth and moist against his cheek. A small brush of something. Lips? It hurt even more, but at the same time it felt wonderful.  
“That’s for not doing it.”  
Now warm lips claimed his and Severus swore that something in him died - only to be revived in the next second. A hand cupped his cheek and somebody else’s - Lily’s! - hair tickled his neck.  
“And that’s for wanting me so much, you had to think about it”, she whispered and sat down on his lap, looking into his black eyes. “But next time, just ask me. I would not mind spending the next hours hugging and cuddling and … Kissing?”


End file.
